This is the advanced example. It uses the jw flv player to create a flash proxy. This basically lets me control the youtube video as if it were a local .f4v file. With this method I can specify any options, autostart, volume, playlists, etc.. But it's rather complex so lets start with 3 other methods to embed YouTube video.
How I was able to preload many flash flv and swf files on one of my clients sites that has a lot of online video and relatively small traffic. Their site visitors would usually watch 3-10 videos per visit and so to make the videos load almost instantly on every page I came up with a way to preload the top 10 .flv files and the swf flv player files as soon as the visitor successfully started watching the 1st video. Of course I also setup .htaccess caching on the server so that once they downloaded the files into their cache they would never request them from the server again. I was having fun with this so its pretty funky and uses some really cool combinations of javascript, swf preloader from xml, css classes to help automate it all..
If you want to pre-load .flv / .mp3 files into a visitors browser cache using flash, here's the actionscript I use to do it, and some ideas behind a good javascript implementation using swfobject or ufo.
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I used to have a problem of controlling flash elements on my sites.. On one site we have 6 different flash flv movies that are all the same size and are in the same position on the page. But only 1 is displayed at a time based on what the user wants to watch. So the selected flash movie needs to have the highest stacking order/zIndex.